our
first
swim
was
the
last
swim
of
summer.

you
said
i
needed
boys
that

smelt
like

the
sea;

now that they are gone

and
you
are

right,


memories

lurk

down
by
the
wooden
boats.

things i didn’t know about

i hate not knowing everything.

it
is
a
reminder
that
the
world
exists
without
me,

that
i
am
not
a
part
of
everything.

if
only
i
had
known
then

you
can
only

romanticise

something
when
it’s


gone,

like
some
kind
of

consolation prize

for your loss.

i
will
shut
my
eyes,

open
my
legs

and
view
the
world
as
i
see
it.

i
find
myself
wishing

there
was
only
one
place

i
had
ever
known
you

so
i
could

destroy it.

here
are
too
many
places
that
have

part
of
me.

we
drove
back
the
following
night

and
you
said

we
had
won

and
i
knew
by
you
saying
it

that
we
hadn’t.